Turkey

I cooked a Turkey this last weekend. I would say that I am 2 for 2 now. I have cooked two trukeys and both have been good. I will give you a tip on what to remember so that you don't end up frustrated like me, and I will give you a tip on what I attibute to my success.

1. Always remember the thaw. A frozen turkey wants to give up its frozeness like an East coast driver wants to let you merge in traffic. Start about three days before you think you need to and everything will work out. Why else would I be writing about turkeys in September? You should start thawing the damn things now. Actually, the safest and least troublesome way to thaw a frozen turkey is in the fridge. This takes about three to four days depending on the size of the turkey. I never think this far ahead, so I end up doing dangerously stupid stuff like letting it sit out overnight the night before.
2. Breasts pointing up is not as good as breasts pointing down. I would venture to guess that 90% of everyone out there thinks that you gotta cook a turkey with the breasts up. This is a mistake. You can have good tender and moist breast (are those two words allowed together) this way but it takes much more effort. Cook the thing breasts down (or upside down if you will) and all the juices flow back down into the breasts. Nobody wants the juices dripping out. That just dries things out and requires a lot of maintenance. Then about thirty minutes before its done flip it over to get a nice golden color.

The best part about number two is that the metaphor works as well.