For Lemon: THANK GOD I'M WHITE!

So I'm zipping along to work this morning and the po-po comes up behind me and hits the rollers. "Gah!" I think, "it's finally catching up to me." He asks me if I knew why he stopped me, I said "no," and he says it was because I crossed two lanes without signaling (does that count as a New Jersey slide?)

Thank Crom he didn't have his radar gun on me! I was sure he pulled me over for bumping along in the low 90s. But no, something not as severe I think, so there was a chance I'd not get a ticket. Lo and behold - a warning!

Now I asked the constable (seriously, he was a constable) why I was getting a warning, and not a ticket. He said, "because you're white, of course." Then he let me play with his mace (I sprayed some non-causcasians for a giggle), and after that we drove around in his cruiser while I got to turn on the siren whenever I wanted to. Well, almost - I was about to blast some little old lady when he stopped me. "Hold on there my Aryan brother, she's white." We pulled up beside her and doggonit, he was right. I thought she was Hispanic, but she just had a tan.

So then we toodled over to Little Dehli, and I got to write out a bunch of DWIs (Driving While Indian) to all the Indian soccer moms in Toyota Siennas. After that I went back to my car, and an escort of cruisers drove me to work.

And it's all true, up to the point where I wrote that he was a constable. But seriously though, I'm sure I got to skate because I'm white. Either that, or it was the fact that I haven't been pulled over for about seven years, and I haven't had a ticket for close to nine.