Aaaaaww, yeah...cue the theme music!

[from Ain't It Cool News]

I'm still trying to recapture my innocence...

As more is revealed about this infamous Screech tape, we learn that this is all a part of some game he plays with his friends:

The sex tape got out because Diamond and some buddies have a "monthly gathering" wherein they exchange such tapes which earn points based on "what [we're] able to accomplish" on the tapes: "We do it almost like poker. [The tape] could have been left out in anybody's home, machine, computer."

It's a bit unnerving to know that such groups exist in this country, using women as mere poker chips. It's even more sad to know that Screech will probably get a boost in his career with all this publicity.

Luckily, the Kool-Aid Gang has found more wholesome ways to bond our friendships with each other, such as this blog where the closest thing we get to a Dirty Sanchez is fart jokes and my stories about lactose intolerance.

With that, I leave you with a couple of humorous cartoons, and wish you all a good weekend:

From Weird Science bully to Iron Man

Ain't It Cool News broke this yesterday, and I guess it's been confirmed all over the press today--Robert Downey, Jr. has been cast as Tony Stark in the upcoming Iron Man movie.

I'm not sure what I think about this casting choice. Robert Downey, Jr. isn't someone I would think about for any superhero role. This reminds me a bit of Michael Keaton being picked to play Batman. That turned out OK--not great, but acceptable. I guess Robert Downey, Jr. can bring his own personal demons with substance abuse to the role, though, as I'd expect some heavy scenes about Tony Stark and his alcoholism assuming Marvel doesn't chicken out.

Anyone have any thoughts? Honestly, I can't have that much of an opinion considering I didn't read all that much Iron Man in my day.

Our Cheating Hearts

According to this recent study, MBA students are the biggest cheaters in graduate school. Engineers? Second. So does this mean Wankmaster and Fandango are doubly bad? I think medical and health-related occupation students were somewhere in the middle, although I'd like to think nurses are skewing our numbers.

And in last place? Humanities, meaning Scootypuff must be our moral compass! Oh my...

Money Don't Grow On Trees

...so after we've posted three YouTube videos in a row, this leads me to wonder, I never see advertisements on these videos, and they must take up a ton of hard drive space somewhere on some remote server farm. So who's actually paying for all this? How do they make money? It sure ain't physics...

If only we had done stuff like this ...

we could have avoided all those run-ins with the police.

I'm not even sure what to say about this...

Wander's Video Pick of the Day on Kool-Aid Gang's TRL

A request from Wander to post this video: "It's our new theme song!" Unfortunately, Wander seemed to overlook that I am not white. [Insert snarky remarks from Scootypuff, Jr. about me and bananas.] Aside from that, this video is eerily familiar...

Exciting times in baseball...

Scottypuff, Jr. Warning: This post involves the topic of baseball and may be hazardous to his physical health and mental sanity. It does involve your new home of Houston, though, so you might want to pay attention to know what all the fuss is about locally.

We're getting close to October, and wouldn't you know it that the St. Louis Cardinals and the Houston Astros are going at it again. If you haven't been keeping up, the Redbirds had a very comfortable seven game lead over the Astros in the National League Central Division. It seemed like a given that Houston's season was pretty much dead and St. Louis would coast into the playoffs. Of course, no one anticipated St. Louis would have one of the worst meltdowns in baseball history, losing seven straight including getting swept by the Astros in four last week.

But leave it to Albert Pujols to pull out what looked to be their eighth loss last night, and hit a clutch three-run homer in the eigth inning to win the game 4-2 over the San Diego Padres and end the losing streak. If this was Columbus, OH, I think people would be rioting in the streets here in St. Louis. With the Astros continuing on their hot streak, this is looking to be a very exciting time down the stretch, and it's not even the playoffs yet.

The Wander thought of the day

S-C-R-E-E-E-E-E-E-C-H!!!!

OK, I just couldn't resist posting about this recent find today. I've begun to notice that Saved By The Bell has actually become this pipeline to sex and debauchery. We all know about Elizabeth Berkley's (aka Jessie Spano) plunge into B-movie infamy in Showgirls. Then I was subjected to seeing Mario Lopez (aka AC Slater) in the buff (including the gratuitous butt shot and slow-motion sequence of him soaping himself in the shower) on Nip/Tuck last week, although I'll have to admit I was feeling a bit envious of Slater's chiseled body as I felt my big Buddha belly jiggle while sitting on the couch.

Crazy to think that of all the alumni of SBTB, Mark-Paul Gosselaar (aka Zack Powers) would be the only one to have come out of that show with a semi-respectable career, having a decent stint on NYPD Blue before the series got cancelled. Of course, I'm sure he exposed his butt, too, as just about every other male cast member did on that show.

But focusing back to the topic of this post. Whatever happened to Dustin Diamond? I know I've seen him on the stand-up comedy circuit advertised on posters every so often. That seems OK. And I assume pulling out the whole Screech routine is enough to get him a bit more than a nod and a wink from the random woman here and there. But these days, riding on your past success as a child TV star just doesn't seem drum up as much interest in people these days. No, as Pamela Anderson, Tommy Lee, Brett Michaels, and Paris Hilton will tell you, it's all about homemade porn! And if this report is true, the world is about to be exposed to a whole lot more of Screech than we ever wanted!

I think Tiffany-Amber Thiessen (aka Kelly Kapowski) has established a place within the TV community on various shows and guest appearances. However, considering I haven't seen much of Lark Voorheis lately since her brief stint on Days of Our Lives awhile back, the Lisa Turtle movies can't be far behind.

I imagine Wankmaster Scratch's world is now crumbling before him. Or perhaps he's oddly excited by this news? Not to worry, though, I haven't heard anything from Punky Brewster lately.

Blogging with purpose

I came across this column on Slate.com called "Blogging the Bible." Basically, the author David Plotz starts from Genesis and has been blogging about his rediscovery of the Bible book by book--he's on the Book of Joshua now. An excerpt from his introduction to this project:

So, what can I possibly do? My goal is pretty simple. I want to find out what happens when an ignorant person actually reads the book on which his religion is based. I think I'm in the same position as many other lazy but faithful people (Christians, Jews, Moslems, Hindus). I love Judaism; I love (most of) the lessons it has taught me about how to live in the world; and yet I realized I am fundamentally ignorant about its foundation, its essential document. So, what will happen if I approach my Bible empty, unmediated by teachers or rabbis or parents? What will delight and horrify me? How will the Bible relate to the religion I practice, and the lessons I thought I learned in synagogue and Hebrew School?

Give it a read, if you've got the time.

The important aspects of male education

Remember that day around 6th grade when all the girls were shuffled off to another room to watch a film about their periods? Maybe this is what they should have been showing the boys:

Luke Skywalker, sippin' on gin and juice!

Something I've probably already emailed to you guys before, but still funny for all you Star Wars junkies...

Damned if you do, damned if you don't...

I've been casually following this recent story about the leaked National Intelligence Estimate report finding that the war in Iraq has actually increased the overall terrorist threat in the United States. I'll admit that I was duped into believing the faulty intelligence about weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. I figured, if someone with as much integrity as Colin Powell would put his neck out there for this, surely it must be true. Even prominent Congressmen on the other side of the aisle like John Kerry and Hillary Clinton, both of whom you would have suspected would have had insider access to this intelligence and could have interpreted whether they were credible or not, apparently believed Iraq was a threat, too, and gave the President the authority to wage war.

At the start of this conflict, I thought this could be a good idea. Position the United States smack in the middle of the cinderbox that is the Middle East, and take down fundamentalists like our positioning in western Europe took down the Soviet Union and communism. And although it sounds extremely bad to say that we went to war for oil, I'd argue that protecting our oil interests in the region is very important to our national security and economy, having much more impact on our lives than merely padding the pockets of the petroleum industry. I'm still under the belief that no matter how far-fetched the neoconservative ideas of pacifying the Middle East were, the right intentions were there, albeit the right plan might not have been.

Alas, the intelligence was false, the weapons weren't there, and we're left with a situation where we're damned if we pull out and damned if we stay. The Dems seem to be grabbing onto this new intelligence report and turning the tables on the Republicans. And, of course, the White House is firing back today (from the New York Times):

Mr. Bush said today that he agreed with the intelligence report’s findings that "because of our successes against the leaders of Al Qaeda, the enemy is becoming more diffuse and independent." He said he was not surprised that enemies of the United States would use the conflict in Iraq to attract recruits to join in "their murderous ways."

Which leads me to wonder, who's right? If you believe the White House, much of the leaked material from the NIE report was taken out of context, and after it's declassified, the report taken as a whole will paint a much different picture. I could interpret Bush's comments to mean that although the war in Iraq has created a recruitment tool for terrorism, the terrorists being recruited are not very organized and, thus, are less of a threat to pull of something as grand and intricately planned as September 11th. Of course, that also seems to make us vulnerable to a more invisible threat or some isolated lunatic with an army of suicide bombers at his disposal.

I don't know where I'm going with this. Hopefully, I didn't offend anyone--this was a bit unfiltered. I'm just vomiting out what's in my head, and interested to see what you guys have to say, as this is what I kind of intended this forum would be for. Perhaps if we had real leaders in government, I wouldn't feel compelled to think about this stuff.

Heroes - Good enough to survive the chopping block?

Did anyone catch the series premeire of Heroes last night? There was a part where one of the characters is talking about the human genome and the potential of having the powers of teleportation and telepathy locked within our DNA--sounded like something straight from the X-Men and Professor Xavier's mouth. They even threw in a Kitty Pryde/X-Men reference later in the show.

I'm afraid, though, if I wasn't such a comic book geek that I might have been tempted to change the channel. It's got potential, but I hope it starts moving a bit faster in the next couple of episodes. NBC is airing an encore presentation tonight at 7:00 PM Central if you missed it. Let me know what you think.

As if I needed more ways to procrastinate on the internet...

A little nugget of gold from Pop Candy today--free episodes of The Simpsons online! WOOHOO!

The world cried "Uncle!" and K-Fed showed mercy...

May we all have a moment of silence for "PopoZao."

...

OK, you may resume your normal day.

I think they tried to bring an actual cyclone for the game...

I didn't get to see Texas vs. Iowa State this weekend, but from what I've read, the thunderstorm that cleared out the stadium for a good 70 minutes was the highlight of the game.

A pretty dominating performance by Texas, for the most part, from what I can tell. But it sounds like Greg Davis kept it pretty conservative for Colt McCoy yet again. I'm actually a bit surprised Texas was able to put up as many points as they did. And giving up over 300 yards in the air? Where is this stellar Longhorns secondary that I read about prior to the season starting? The annual Red River Shootout against Oklahoma is looking scarier by the minute.

ESPN's recap:

It was over when... The skies opened up. The 70-minute rain delay crushed any rally Iowa State tried to muster.

Gameball goes to... Colt McCoy. Texas' redshirt QB made quick work of the Cyclones, completing 18-for-23 for 210 yards and two TDs.

Stat of the game... 46: The Horns' veteran defense held Iowa State to just 46 yards on the ground, but gave up 303 in the air.

I know he had a mediocre start to the season, but isn't this punishment a bit extreme?

Seriously, though, that must have been some kind of beating he got from the Carolina defense. The voyeuristic side of me almost wishes I had watched that game.

I guess if his dad, Phil Simms, ever tries to pull any "back in my day" football stories about all the injuries he accumulated as a quarterback for the New York Giants, Chris can always snap back, "Dude! I ruptured my spleen! They had to remove my spleen! Beat that, Pops!"

I Can Build It, I Just Can't Upload this

Here. How do I post this to my profile (since you all are so proficient, and i am not), as the suggested images from your posts the other day aren't doing it for me. Can someone assist with this profile picture, at least set this up so i can upload it (give me a URL to reference).

Excuse me, now i have to go build something else. Will blog later.

Oh, and please comment.

Western Version of Brokeback Mountain

I had to share this headline from the frontpage of the Sunday paper this week. There is big debate over a proposition on the November ballot, about blocking same-sex marriage and outlawing alternative legal recognition for gay couples and taking their health care and other benefits away from their partners.
These men had some comments on the issue. So did the pastor on the left. The pastor supports the bill, the men obviously object.

I won't argue the point either way, but i thought the image resembled visions of Brokeback Mountain, the later years. Rough looking men from the West, not necessarily cowboys on a sheep drive, but they just looked out of place for this article.

Nothing like good 'ol panda porn!

A description from Amazon.com:

Whether in the wild or in captivity, our furry, scaly, and feathered friends exhibit an incredible determination to mate. Find out which animals engage in dance competitions, cannibalism, and intercourse that lasts for six months. Discover why lady weevils have a really hard time of it. And why the female Mormon cricket isn't offended when her partner insists on weighing her first. Marvel at the transgender clownfish, and gaze with envy at the humble barnacle and its remarkable sexual-organ-to-body-length ratio. In the world of animal sex there are apparently few traits or behaviors nature has deemed too bizarre to evolve. How Animals Have Sex is hilariously informative, filled with breathtaking facts and astonishing color photographs. It will, above all, show you why you should never, ever try to explain sex by making reference to "the birds and the bees" - unless you want your kids to grow up thinking that it's normal to get aroused by balloons or to have your genitals explode half way through getting busy. You’ll never look at Mother Nature the same way again.

[from the cool hunter]

Who knew kicking was so exciting?

[AP photo: Mitch Cozad, left, and starting punter Rafael Mendoza, right]

I remember back in our days at Texas when Fandango very briefly flirted with the idea of polishing up his kicking skills and trying out for the football team. Alas, that dream never materialized, and he has since settled down to a comfortable life of hard work, business trips, and family. But maybe, just maybe, in the deep recesses of his mind, he thinks back to that twinkle of a dream to kick the game-winning field goal ala David Pino in 2005 over the Buckeyes. Maybe it wasn't meant to be. And perhaps he wasn't driven enough, like this guy, Mitch Cozad.

I'm sure you've all heard this recent story about Cozad, the backup punter from the University of North Colorado who was allegedly so hellbent on starting, he stabbed the kicking leg of the starter. That, in of itself, is pretty looney. But after reading this article from Sports Illustrated, you'll realize this guy was on the edge even before he got to college. Describing how he had absolutely no aspirations in football other than to be a kicker:

During his junior year, Cozad was stuck on the bench while quarterback Corey Bramlet, who would go on to star at the University of Wyoming, routinely split the uprights. By Cozad's senior year, though, Bramlet had graduated and it was Cozad's time to shine.

Former Wheatland head coach Paul Miller had other ideas. He wanted Cozad, who was 5-foot-11 and 210 pounds, to play on the offensive line. Cozad resisted so vehemently that he took the kicking tee and wouldn't let anybody else use it.

May we all have more level-headed children than this.

Sometimes TiVo can be so bad

Crap! My TiVo didn't record last night's season premeire of The Office. Once everyone's seen it, someone will have to give me a recap. I guess Grey's Anatomy is higher up on the Season Pass list and recorded some stupid "catch-me-up on what happened last season with lots of clips" episode. Crap! Damn! Sh!tty @ss rat f*ck!! Who made up that phrase anyway?

All it's missing is a curly slide...

[image from Laughing Squid]

My wife heard about this project in San Francisco going on today called PARK(ing), a temporary effort to take back public space normally reserved for cars and turning them into parks. Basically, they set up a temporary park in a couple of metered parking spots. Anyone can sit and enjoy the park so long as they feed the meter. If I only had this much free time to think up things like this and make them happen...

And this is bad?

My golf skills suck. I'm usually lucky if the ball actually goes forward rather than looping back over my head, so I feel for this guy in Japan. And he still didn't finish last:

Japanese golfer shoots 19 on par-3 hole
Reuters

TOKYO -- Superstitious or not, Japanese golfer Mitsuhiro Tateyama is likely to shudder whenever he comes across the number 19 in future after an horrific round Thursday at the Acom International.

Still, Tateyama could see the funny side after setting a Japanese record by taking 19 on a par-3 hole at the Ishioka Golf Club.

The 38-year-old found the rough with his second shot before hitting it into bushes where he took 14 shots to hack the ball out. At he least avoided three-putting.

It was the worst single-hole score since Norio Suzuki incorrectly signed for a 42, his nine-hole total, at a Japanese tournament in 1987. The previous worst for one hole was 15.

"There were more reporters around me than for the leader," joked Tateyama after his meltdown on the eighth. "That must be a world record or something."

Tateyama added: "My mind went blank. I lost count of the number of strokes I had. I couldn't even see the ball when it was in the bushes. I just wanted to get it out quick."

Tateyama, who has never won a Japanese tour title, finished with a 13-over-par 84 but surprisingly avoided carding the day's worst score after recovering with four birdies.

Another Frank Miller Book Hops to the Big Screen

This looks pretty cool. It's Miller's story of the battle of Thermopylae.

You might need your surveying scope for this...

I found Cooking for Engineers hidden in my bookmarks folder, and thought engineering-minded guys like Wild Willie, Fandango, and Wankmaster Scratch might enjoy this. I've never actually tried making anything on this website, so cook at your own risk.

A distraction for your procrastinating pleasure

No real usefulness, but I thought this Coverpop site was kind of cool.

Gettin' lucky in Kentucky

As is usually the case when we have free time, my wife and I can never figure out what to do for fun in St. Louis, so we headed out of town to Louisville, KY earlier this month over a free weekend. We've been out there a couple of times before, and I'm not sure exactly why we're always compelled to go back except that it has it's own brand of quirkiness that isn't present in the entire state of Missouri (although Kansas City is really trying hard). This time around, we sampled some of the typical Louisville traditions such as the Hot Brown (a mix of toast, turkey, bacon, Mornay sauce, parmesan cheese, and a slice or two of tomato to confuse you into thinking this might be somewhat healthy) at the Brown Hotel (where Orlando Bloom's character was staying at in Elizabethtown), a version of Derby pie (chocolate chip pecan) at the Homemade Ice Cream and Pie Kitchen, and a bourbon sampler flight at Bourbons Bistro. This may be the first time I've ever actually sampled multiple kinds of bourbon at the same time, but it was quite a treat, and a good way to distinguish some of the subtleties.


So something you'll find around town is this "Keep Louisville Weird" campaign, which seems to be modeled after the "Keep Austin Weird" movement. However, Austin's movement seems to have been spoiled by some greedy t-shirt company who trademarked the whole "Keep Austin Weird" slogan. This has lead the original creators in Austin to make up a t-shirt like this:

Apparently, other cities with their own bit of quirkiness have adopted this as well, including Santa Cruz, CA and Boulder, CO. As in Austin, though, this has become a more commercialized slogan than the original creators ever envisioned. But anything to promote local businesses never really bothered me.

Not to make you think eating is all we do on trips, let me tell you about one of our favorite "weird" places in Louisville--ear X-tacy, a local music store which is probably on par with Waterloo Records in Austin. Any time we're in Louisville, we make it a point to broaden our usual musical selections here, as they put out numerous listening stations with musicians we wouldn't necessarily know about just listening to the radio. Kathleen Edwards is probably our favorite female musician these days, much thanks to my wife going out on a limb and buying a gem of a debut CD at ear X-tacy a few years ago. If you're not listening to her, you need to be.

This time around we picked up Air Stereo from The Damnwells and Black Holes and Revelations from Muse, two bands I had never really heard about before.

The Damnwells are a bit reminiscent of a more radio-friendly Paul Westerberg or The Replacements. Not a bad CD, but nothing I'm gonna rave too much about. Muse, however, is definitely something to go check out. I'm not even sure how to describe their music, because their sound changes throughout the album. They go from English stadium rock anthems to hard rock heavy metal to complicated electronic synth. It's definitely a complex album that takes some listening to really appreciate. Somehow, I imagine Wander is reading this and thinking, "Yup, I've been listening to them for almost a decade now (or however long this band has been around)."

And now, a brief message from Wander...

Should we be gearing up for a McCain vs. Gore debate?

Take a look at this poll. The numbers for John McCain vs. Hillary Clinton weren't so surprising. But look at Al Gore's numbers--from 29% likely to vote for him a year ago to now 40%, and just as good as Hillary's numbers. Just goes to show you what showing the public what you're really passionate about instead of pandering can really do for your image.

I've been pretty impressed with McCain recently, standing up to the White House regarding these issues about torture. Nice to know he's still willing to be somewhat of a maverick within the Republican Party to stand up for what he believes in. This recent article in the Washington Post exemplifies when torture can go terribly wrong. However, maybe I've been watching too much 24, but if you can't submit prisoners to some form of discomfort or humiliation, what incentive would real terrorists and enemies have to talk? I'm just asking--I really haven't made up my opinion on this.

[both topics from Fully Myelinated]

The new 007 track is out, and I don't like it...

I was getting really jazzed up about Casino Royale until I saw this clip of Chris Cornell's theme song for the new movie. I like Audioslave and all, but this just doesn't seem to fit. If only those rumors about Goldfrapp doing the title track were true. Oh well, I never liked the title track for From Russia With Love either, but that is still one of the best Bond films, and probably close to what this new iteration of James Bond is trying to acheive with less reliance on super-spy gadgets and over-the-top villains. And Duran Duran's A View To A Kill is probably one of my favorite 007 tunes, but also one of the worst movies in the franchise. [from Pop Candy]

Now That is What I Call Dragon Breath!

I remember back to a time in Scooty's kitchen with most of us standing around and someone was eating some left over Thai food. Cashew Chicken if I remember correctly. One of my favorite dishes from that particular restaurant, and this particular dish had hot Thai peppers in it to add flavor.

Like most high school boys there was usually (if not always) an element of competitiveness and stupidity. On this night, I challenged the eater (I believe it was Scooty's meal) to eat one of the peppers. The challenge was reversed, and I accepted. The only other thing I can remember is that I spent the next 10 minutes with my mouth under the sink.

What is odd about this is that, I have grown to really enjoy spicy foods. Actually I have always liked spicy foods, but I just like getting it hotter and hotter as time passes. So about four months ago I decided to combing a couple of my interests. I planted some Habanero plants in my garden. (You should see some of the stuff I have gotten from this garden. Check out one of my tomatoes.)

Because Habaneros are a long maturing plant, they are just now coming into maturity. I have had a couple so far, and I must say that they are hot. I have had them before, but when you grow your own it is like eating food you cooked in the wilderness (no matter what it tastes like it is the best thing on earth at that moment). I mean these babies are hot. Having heard about Habaneros being the hottest I decided to do a little looking on the net to verify if this was true or not.

Heat is produced from capsaicin (an oil which is why water is the enemy) and peppers are typically measured by Scoville units that range anywhere from 0 to over 10 million. Over a ten million and you are probably talking about pure capsaicinoids. Jalepenos are around 10,000 Scoville units, while Habaneros are range from 100,000 to 325,000 units.

Now that is hot, but is it the hottest. The answer is no. There are a couple of peppers that I hope to never put near my mouth or body for that matter. The Naga Jolokia and Dorset Naga compare to a Habanero like a Habanero compares to a Jalepeno. That is freakin' insanity.

Finally, why would anyone ever like spicy stuff anyway. Well, when you eat spicy food your body feels the pain. Your brain then decides that endorphins need to be released to help deal with the pain, and you end up experiencing a natural high. So the next time you have something spicy in front of you, enjoy. Let it burn and feel the natural high usher its way into your body, and then go have some Cocaine ... the drink that is.

I don't read so well, so I need some pictures

I've noticed that Fandango hasn't picked out an avatar to represent himself. As he's a busy man, I thought we could all find one for him. This is also his punishment for not blogging enough. Here are my initial choices:

I've often thought Fandango had a striking resemblance to the American Gigolo himself, Richard Gere. I know there was that whole gerbil thing awhile ago (Gere, not Fandango), but I think he's cleaned up with the help of the Buddha. And he was formerly married to Cindy Crawford and is now attached to a former Bond girl--how can you complain about that?

OK, so Fandango is probably a good foot (or two) taller than the Grandmaster of Scientology. But I've also heard a couple of ladies mention they thought Fandango had a slight resemblance to Tom Cruise. Or maybe that was Fandango who told me that. Anywho, can't you just imagine the trademark Fandango laugh with this picture?

Choice number three? ET, the Extraterrestrial. Why? Because of those freakishly long ET fingers, that's why!

The final option from my quick brainstorming session is the Hellraiser, reflecting on Fandango during his younger, wilder college days in Texas.

OK. Those are my choices. Send me your votes, or tell Fandango to put up a picture already.

The Man Reads The Word

And you thought a face transplant would be hard to adjust to...

This story from the Associated Press made me wince. Apparently, a Chinese man underwent a penis transplant who lost his original member in some undisclosed accident. And what did he do after the successful surgery?

Fourteen days after the penis transplant, the recipient and his wife requested that the organ be removed "because of the wife's psychological rejection as well as the swollen shape of the transplanted penis," the surgeons report in the journal.

Anywho, be sure to mark that on your organ donation card.

I still have trouble finishing a book in one year...

Holy cow! Check out this story in the Washington Post about a guy who graduated from the University of Virginia in one year. He had over half his college education completed in AP credits before he even set foot on campus! And 37 hours in one semester? Crap, I remember when I overloaded with 19 credits at Southwestern. Granted, three of those hours were taken up by Jazz Band, but it still felt like a lot at the time. But this guy?

He had some low points, especially late in April when the workload for his 37 credits seemed crushing, and his grades started to slip. (To some Bs.)

I feel like a complete slacker now. Sigh. Let me blog some more...

This just seems like a bad idea on so many levels...

I'm sure most of you have tried a Red Bull or similar energy drink. Hot on the heels of this beverage fad is Cocaine. When I first saw this, I thought it was a joke. As if kids didn't get enough mixed signals about alcohol, smoking, sex--now they're supposed to believe that cocaine is actually good for you.

I especially like this quote from the drink's creator, James Kirby:

It's an energy drink, and it's a fun name. As soon as people look at the can, they smile.

It's fun?! Perhaps the end of days is eminent. God help us...

Not to be confused with the rapper, DMX...

In case you were hoping to profit off of the innocent desires of children this Christmas, Fisher-Price will be releasing their new and improved Tickle-Me-Elmo for the holiday season. In fact, he's so cool now, he only goes by his new initialized moniker, TMX. Get your eBay accounts ready, and prepare to fleece the kiddos! A-hahahahaha, A-hahahahaha!!

Actually, I kind of like seeing the Tickle-Me-Elmo's at the store. It's rather fun to set them all off on the shelves. But for some reason, my wife gives me an eye roll, and walks away like she doesn't even know who I am. What gives?

AAAAAAAAAAAAArrrgggghhh

Thanks to my broinlaw, I was reminded that today is "National Talk Like A Pirate Day." Here are two links that prove it. One is from one of my favorite sites, Wikipedia, and the other is just your everyday run of the mill pirate site.

The Life and Times of John Kerry and the Snooze Gang

If you didn't hear enough from Congressmen in the mainstream press, you can now read John Kerry's rants on this new Congress Blog. I may use this as a sleep aid.

[from Wonkette]

More Fuzzy Math

I couldn't figure out if you could leave a picture in the comment section so this is an addition to Swany's post.

Fuzzy Math

This editorial in the New York Times may help to explain some of the reason as to why the United States has fallen behind much of the world in basic math and science skills. When did it become so un-P.C. to give children some basic tools to build on?

An excerpt from the article:

One of the most infamous fads took root in the late 1980’s, when many schools moved away from traditional mathematics instruction, which required drills and problem solving. The new system, sometimes derided as “fuzzy math,’’ allowed children to wander through problems in a random way without ever learning basic multiplication or division. As a result, mastery of high-level math and science was unlikely. The new math curriculum was a mile wide and an inch deep, as the saying goes, touching on dozens of topics each year.

Many people trace this unfortunate development to a 1989 report by an influential group, the National Council of Teachers of Mathematics. School districts read its recommendations as a call to reject rote learning. Last week the council reversed itself, laying out new recommendations that will focus on a few basic skills at each grade level.

Under the new (old) plan, students will once again move through the basics — addition, subtraction, multiplication, division and so on — building the skills that are meant to prepare them for algebra by seventh grade. This new approach is being seen as an attempt to emulate countries like Singapore, which ranks at the top internationally in math.

Sometimes, taking a poop in the airlock isn't so funny...

I don't know if this made me more or less lost...

This may be of interest to only Wild Willie, as I'm not sure if anyone else has gotten hooked on Lost. ABC had been sponsoring an online game all summer called "The Lost Experience" to tie-in with the show. Quite a few clues and video clips were revealed, including the meaning of Hurley's "lucky" lotto numbers...

What Makes a Good Movie?

Everybody’s take on what makes for a good movie is going to be different, but I do feel like there is some universal elements to a good movie. In an effort to hash out some of those elements I have put together a list.

1. DO NOT follow a Hollywood formula. Hollywood formulas suck and are only designed to put money in the pockets of those with too much money to begin with. Take Alien vs. Predator. If you removed the formulaic BS from this movie and made more of a story about it, this movie could have been really good. I could have written a better script on this one. If any of you listen to Ben Folds he has a song he sings where he just sits right down and shits one out. This of course is referring to the pressure placed on musicians by record companies to keep putting out music. His thoughts are it can’t be forced, but I can sit down and just shit one out using a formula. That’s what 75% of the movies we see today are. Something that has been shat out.
2. Go with a solid story. Then if action fits into the story great, but don’t ever make it the centerpiece. Draw me into the movie with my mind, not my eyes. For that matter keep me in the movie with my mind and not my eyes, too.
3. Solid stories are often made through strong character development. This is not accomplished through a cheap romance. Use struggles, happiness, laughter, crying, etc. to help us see what makes up a character.
4. Have people respond like they do in real life to stuff.
5. Go for witty dialogue that makes the movie quotable.

I am sure I could keep going on and on, but the truth of this post comes down to the fact that I just watched Serenity for the second time tonight, and I freakin’ love that movie. I don’t know how many of the 5 above really apply but I think that Serenity hits all five items and does it well.

It doesn’t follow THE formula. It might follow a formula, but not the one most often shat out. Sure it has action, but it is not crammed into the story. Sure there is a love interest, but it is role reversed and humorous. Sure it has a happy ending, but cool people die.

The story is solid, and I feel like you get to know the characters. The pilot claims he is “like a feather on the wind, see how I soar.” Then his ship gets knocked around some and when asked what the hell his statement means, and you can tell he looks a little shaken instead of cocksure about his flying. I like that. It seems more realistic to me. Plus that makes for a great quote. I also like, “She is damaging my calm.”

Well Hollywood, quit damaging my calm with crappy movies. More like Serenity please.

[After many failed attempts to attach a picture to this post, I have decided to just post without one. Have any of you experienced this problem in the past? This is the second time that this has happened to me, and the only thing I can figure is that I cut and pasted from Word.]

The trailer alone scares the piss out of me.

This is for an upcoming independent movie called Jesus Camp. It basically (and by the looks of it, even-handedly) chronicals a new trend in fundamentalist Christianity in the U.S., that of indoctrinating children into a political fundamentalism with the intended goal of raising them to assume leadership of the country. To me, it just looks like the flip side of what the radical Muslims are trying to accomplish in the Middle East - a hard-line, fundamentalist, theocracy.

I bet if this were translated into Arabic, one could dub over a video of a Pakastani terrorist training camp and send it to air on Al-Jazeera, and no one would be the wiser.

I hear, and have always heard, radical Christians proclaim that they've "found Jesus," or "let Jesus into their hearts," but I have little confidence that they know what that means, and even less that they would act upon it.

The more I think about, the more I am convinced that one cannot take another's word for something as important as one's faith. It is something that one must arrive at after much contemplation.

My wife, the Cardinals puppetmaster...

Yesterday was my first visit to the new Busch Stadium here in St. Louis. The old Busch Stadium was a bit of an eyesore, but was still pretty functional and allowed for adequate sight lines no matter what seat you had. Add to that, this town is crazy for the Redbirds, and game attendance never seemed to be a huge problem. Money and revenue is the name of the game these days, though, and the need for more luxury boxes probably prompted the "need" for a new place for the Cardinals to call home.

The new stadium is really nice. But what new stadium isn't? Honestly, all these retro-themed parks are beginning to run together. I sort of felt like I was watching a game in Arlington for a minute, if you could ignore the sea of red in the stadium. Sometimes, I wish they'd take more risk and do something architecturally unique that can almost become iconic for the city. Sometimes you end up with something ugly like the Astrodome in Houston or the old Kingdome in Seattle, but you can also end up with something rather timeless like Soldier Field in Chicago or the upcoming Sprint Center in Kansas City.

Unfortunately, being in a new ballpark didn't increase my wife's interest in the game at all. She instead roamed around for most of the game against the San Francisco Giants and perused the team store, explored the various food choices, and contemplated buying a stuffed Fredbird mascot at the on-site Build-a-Bear shop (which is a St. Louis-born company).

The funny thing is that the Cards seemed to score every time she came back to her seat. When we first got to the game, Pujols batted a runner in and Escarnacion hit a three-run homer in the first inning. She then left to do her exploring (even getting some banking done at the Bank of America ATM). The game remained pretty quiet until she returned in the 5th inning when Scott Rolen batted in Pujols shortly after she sat down. She left again around the 6th inning to get a snow cone because it was hot, and returned in the bottom of the 7th. Can you guess what happened then? Another RBI by Rolen. We left the game with the Cards winning 6-1. Does she have magic power over the Cardinals? Or is this divine intervention to spark more interest within her for the great pastime of America? You decide...

Please, Please, Please ...

When you get married you are more than likely going to be introduced to all of your spouse's family members at some point or another. I have met most of my wife's family members, but it is still going to take me years to remember everyone's name. I don't know if it is a southern thing or if it is because her family has lived in the same area of the country since the original Thanksgiving, but her fam doesn't fool around when it comes to reproduction (or maybe that's the problem ... too much fooling around).

With so many family members you know there are going to be some cool ones and some not so cool ones. I will save you the stories about the not so cool ones, and share this one with you. I got to meet one of her younger cousins (around 23 years old) at the wedding and he had one of the funniest tattoos I have seen. At first glance you would not think it funny at all. On his ankle is a picture of Rocky, the squirrel, on his knees praying. I thought that was kind of off the wall when he showed it to me. Then his brother chimed in with what Rocky was praying for - his nuts to drop.

I suppose you can call it a "rebound"

Texas beat the crap out of Rice. Yawn. I guess I can't blame the media for trying their best to hype up this game, but who really thought the Owls could pull off a win to give Texas their first back to back losses since 1999?

Kind of a crappy weekend for the rest of the Big 12 overall, and everything seems to hurt Texas in the long run. Not that there was much chance of a Texas vs. Ohio State rematch in the National Championship, but losses by ranked Oklahoma, Texas Tech, and Nebraska slammed the door on that possibility.

Oh well. Perhaps Scootypuff can get semi-excited about football for a day--TCU beat Texas Tech 12-3.

Oh, much better than Cats. I'll see it again and again (if the tickets are free)

So I'm pretty excited because the wife managed to snag a couple of tickets last night to Death Cab for Cutie in November at The Pageant. Their latest album Plans is awesome, and I should really get around to posting a review of the CD to get our forum going. And the opening act? OK Go! But even with the big boy money I make these days in comparison to the zero money I made in college, my heart still beats a bit fast and I get a bit diaphoretic when we have to spend $27 for a ticket. You can imagine how pale I looked when my wife told me how much those Madonna tickets in May cost us.

This may be why we never see the Broadway shows at The Fox Theater here in town. The prospect of spending $70+ for a ticket to see Cats never really seems to sit well with me, even if it's the benchmark of what one would want to see again and again. I may change my tune this year, though, as Monty Python's Spamalot will be coming through in November. Has anyone seen it? Is it worth dropping almost a C-bill for a ticket? Who knows, if I enjoy it that much, I might actually plunk down the money to see Cats--they come through in December.

Anywho, I'm off to a Cardinals game today. I finally get to see the new Busch Stadium. Luckily, these tickets were through work and only cost us $10/ticket. The Barry "Juiceman" Bonds and the Giants are in town--Fandango (if you're reading this), aren't you jealous?

To tide you over until my next post, here's a Monty Python/Halo mashup I found for all you XBox geeks reading this:

I guess if this was The Price Is Right, she would have won...

I'd love for her to make a cut at a men's PGA Tour event, so I don't know why I feel compelled to rag on Michelle Wie. Perhaps because I don't want an ultra talented Asian girl mess up what could be a really bright (and possibly historic) future. She's probably got the skills to be as marketable as Tiger. She might even be able to kick ass on the men's PGA Tour, just not now. Coming in dead last at her latest attempt to compete with the men at the 84 Lumber Classic should tell her something.

Scott Verplank reiterated some of the sentiments I had on my last post about Wie:

"Obviously, she's some sort of phenom being a 16-year-old girl who can play like she can, but honestly there's not a male or female in the world who can compete out here at that age," Verplank said. "I'm sure there are some very fine 16-year-old boys who can play, but it would be awful hard for them to come out here and make a scratch. If I was her adviser, I would tell her to go kick all the ladies' tails around for about four years and if she wants to try again when she's 20, 21 and grown up more, and maybe a better player, come on back."

She's getting quite a bit of media attention with these multiple failed attempts, but it's beginning to feel like a game of crying wolf. I think she's used up the 15 minutes this bought her--it's time to get back to winning tournaments on her own turf for awhile.

Hook 'em! Just not on this blog...

After consulting with Wild Willie and seeing the drought of interest so far, I think my idea of a little Texas Longhorns football forum within this group kind of fizzled out. So instead I will point you guys to a couple of sites that Willie threw my way:

Horninco gives some pretty extensive pre-game analysis. Well, let's not mince words. VERY extensive pre-game analysis. He could probably put his entire work together and present it as a thesis for a Ph.D. in sports analysis, if he wanted to. I actually enjoy "The Aftermath" section that gives some commentary after the game, which I kind of had in mind for my own blog. He does a much better job, though.

Burnt Orange Nation is a blog that I actually found through one of Willie's other favorite sites, The Michigan Zone. BON puts out some good commentary about all the goings on in college football, as well as some good analysis about the Longhorns.

I'll probably still post a thought or two on this blog about the Horns. As always, feel free to contribute, if you so feel inclined.

How did we ever survive without broadband?

I never email by dad because he rarely checks his account. So I never really thought about how he gets around on the information superhighway until he asked what I was using for my internet access, because his dial-up service is really slow. Dial-up. DIAL-UP?! As I investigated this more, I realized my dad has been using the same America Online service he signed up for OVER SEVEN YEARS AGO! Do you guys even remember what it used to be like before DSL and cable? Oh, the horror. He thought about cancelling his service, but he could never find the appropriate phone number. Now I can't fault him for that. Even someone as semi-technical savvy as me had a hell of a time trying to figure out how to cancel my own AOL account back in the day.

I thought of my dad as I read this story about an old granny who's been leasing a rotary phone since 1964, and never bothered to buy the phone or upgrade. To think my dad could have been stuck on dial-up speeds until he died. I think this is a sign that I need to go home and visit the folks more often. I don't think I've been back in over two years.

Battlestar Galactica - The Cliff Notes Version

OK, I promise this will be my last post about Battlestar Galactica before the season premiere in October. The Sci-Fi Channel has put out a bunch of primers to get anyone who hasn't been watching up to speed. The USA Network is running the 44 minute long version tonight at 12:00 AM Eastern Time, too, so set your TiVo's/DVR's if you're interested.

OK. No more mention of BSG. Really. I promise. No kidding. I swear...

Ohh how the mind kind wander

... especially with the help of the internet. Needing to actually accomplish some stuff today, I had planned on not spending much time on the blog. Low and behold, here I am blogging away.

It all started with a trip to Wikipedia to re-educate myself on the different surveying tools out there. I recently shot some elevations on a lot my brother-in-law is building a home on. We used a transit, but I was having trouble remembering what a theodolite was used for. Blah, blah, blah. I am probably boring everyone except Fandango with this (maybe Wankmaster is excited as well). Anyway, I still don't know because Wikipedia's featured article is on Jabba the Hutt. Always a sucker for things I thought were cool as a kid (which I still think are cool now), I decided to read what I already knew. You know ... for old time sake. This wandering train of thought has now led me here.

Who would have ever guessed that I would learn something new. Something about StarWars and something about real life. It turns out that Huttese is the lingua franca of galactic organized crime. Not one to pass up an opportunity to learn the short phrases from other langauges (e pluribus unum sort of thing), I wanted to know what lingua franca meant. Thanks to my lust for everything StarWars I can tell you that it is a language widely used beyond its native speakers. How cool is that?

It's no iPod killer, but I guess it's a start

I figured Wild Willie might be interested in this, since he's a big supporter of Windows Media Player and .wma format for his audio files.

Microsoft finally unveiled their long-rumored foray into the portable mp3 market with the Zune. It looks pretty nice (and suspiciously reminiscent of an iPod), although that thing that looks like a click wheel really isn't, at least in the Apple sense of the word.

Some of it's features look promising, such as included wi-fi and the ability to share songs with other players. If I understand this right, you can share ANY song on your Zune player, including ones you bought off their upcoming Zune online music service. After three days, the song somehow becomes unplayable and asks if you want to buy it online. Actually kind of a neat feature considering all the proponents for extinct services like Napster and Kazaa always seemed to argue that the reason music should be available to share for free was so they could listen to new music and try it out first before they went to Best Buy and bought the CD.

The new music service will also feature a subscription service just like Scootypuff has been pretty fond of. Hopefully, the interface will be as easy as iTunes, and not the disaster that the now defunct Sony Connect service was.

I don't know about a mere 30 GB of memory, though. Considering Wander has a 60 GB iPod and is already hurting for more hard drive space, I can't imagine you'd be fitting many episodes of Lost or The Office on a Zune. All in all, my money is still with Apple, but I'm glad Microsoft might be coming out with a product that can keep the pressure on Steve Jobs to continue to innovate. And if the rumors are true, he's already got this thing beat cold with a video iPod in development sporting an even larger screen with a virtual click wheel.

Kiddie warfare

When we were kids, I was always amazed at the things Scootypuff could make out of Legos. They were usually smaller in scale, and luckily for me and the rest of us, he didn't resort to making weapons such as the Gatling gun below:

And no sight of pizza anywhere...

I think I might have mentioned this awhile back, but there was this rumor that a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie was being made that was a bit closer to what Eastman and Laird had imagined with their comic books. Looks like that rumor is real. This teaser trailer from Apple's Quicktime site looks promising (notice which appropriate character falls in the dumpster).

I also happened to come across this trailer for Curse of the Golden Flower, a new film by Zhang Yimou (Hero, The House of Flying Daggers). Pretty cool...

Justin Timberlake, Justin Timberlake, Justin Timberla-a-a-ake...

I think I've fallen off my rocker, 'cause I've actually been enjoying Justin Timberlake's video for SexyBack. But considering JT is working with some rather respectable producers like Timbaland and Rick Rubin, I'm not feeling so ashamed of myself. I'm just opening myself up for ridicule. Fire away, Scootypuff...



Now that I've gotten that out of my system, I'll segway into this next part by telling you about a new song I heard on a USA Today podcast. I'll have to give credit to Wankmaster Scratch for this find--Whitney Matheson puts out a blog called Pop Candy which is really quite an amusing read, as she writes about everything in pop culture from TV, movies, music, games, and even comic books. Scootypuff's dream girl, as I think Scratch put it. As a supplement to her blog, she also recently started up a weekly podcast, which I think has been a bit hit and miss so far. But at the end of each show, she includes her weekly music find. This week was from cartoonist James Kochalka with his new song "Britney's Silver Can." This has something to do with Britney Spears, but ends with a two minute chorus of him singing Justin Timberlake that I found hilarious. Check out the last four or five minutes of her last podcast (streamed in .wma for Wild Willie) if you've got time to kill. Or actually, listen to the whole thing if you're a fan of Y: The Last Man.

And finally, to end with something completely unrelated to Justin Timberlake, the Pop Candy blog just posted this article about a new development in Bend, OR based on the Lord of the Rings. Geek heaven. Reminds me of a couple I met a couple of years ago that named their baby Eowyn after th LOTR character--I'm sure they've already placed their downpayment.

I'd love to fly to the moon with you, but I have to save the universe first...

I saw this on CNN.com and immediately thought someone got really offended by Madonna's ongoing concert tour with her use of the crucifixion and other religious imagery. Alas, it was just a Russian politician who thought it would be cool to send Madonna up as a space tourist.

Oh, and extra points to the first who identifies what movie the title to my posting is from.

UUUhhhhh? Excuse Me?!?!

I came across this this morning and almost fell out of my chair with disgust at how some people think. The article talks about how a top level fashion show in Madrid is turning away models who are too thin. They are wanting models who look healthy. They are stating that the modeling world can have an unhealthy influence on young girls possibly leading them to anorexia or bulemia. I completely agree, and on more than just one point. I have often thought that too skinny is even more unattractive than being fat. But what really got me was this:

"I think its outrageous, I understand they want to set this tone of healthy beautiful women, but what about discrimination against the model and what about the freedom of the designer," said Gould, Elite's North America director, adding that the move could harm careers of naturally "gazelle-like" models.

"what about discrimination" - I would venture to guess that Gould is pissed because her aresenal of models are of the unhealthy variety, and her real compaint is that she is going to lose a lot of money from this scenario. If you really want to complain about discrimination and freedom of designer then why is it only now that you are making a stink. I have never heard of anyone making a stink about the overweight model before. Puhhleeeze.

Take a look at this picture and tell me which one looks healthier, the girl facing you ar the girl walking away?

[Update: First, this picture doesn't fully describe what I am feeling because even the girl facing me is pretty skinny, but how many pictures are floating around out there that would help me get my point across. Second, I might be unfairly equating healthiness and attractiveness, but I don't think so. I think that what makes one attractive is some aspect of healthiness. That might be physical, but it could also be emotional or spiritual. You can be attracted to one while the others are severely lacking. Ideally you want all of them nicely packaged.]

I am a giant mech

Good thing video game sound effects have improved since this.

I don't know what this has to do with the Xbox 360...

Did I mention I love Apple?

Most of the media coverage of Apple's iTunes 7 update yesterday focused on the new movie downloading service. However, I think the real innovation was their new interface called Cover Flow. I just downloaded the new update, had iTunes automatically find all the cover art for the albums in my library, and I'm now flipping through my music collection like a deck of cards. Amazing!

I think Bill Gates made a speech awhile back saying that the real innovations in the coming years will be all about searching. Whoever can make data retreival simple, intuitive, accurate, and the most efficient, will likely come out on top. Unfortunately, I think Apple is still setting the benchmarks.

Classical Savion

Tellulah and I saw Savion Glover in concert last night. He was tap dancing to classical selections. It was not only amazing seeing one of the greatest dance choreographers of out time, but seeing the next best thing to Gregory Hines, one of my personal heroes. It was also easy to see the training Savion recieved from Sammy Davis Jr. as well. And despite all the movies I've seen Savion in, he'll always be that tap dancing kid on Sesame Street when we were young, to me.

It Just Keeps Calling to Me

I have been one to spend inordinate amounts of money to help fund the Skywalker Ranch. I thought I was free of this unhealthy habit, but after reading this little article I think I am going to get sucked back in.

I was excited to hear that Lucas was releasing the original unmolested versions of Episodes IV, V, and VI. My first thought was that I would wait until I had enough money to be able to buy the original versions of the Star Wars Trilogy. You know, maybe space it out over a couple of years. I guess though, that when the dark side calls, you just have to give in.

Maybe I can just get my fix by checking out Chewy's blog.

My wife, the ghetto dairy thief

I was tempted to call this a Wild Willie-esque act of frugality, but I have to admit that it's actually my wife who has become quite the sneak for dairy at our local espresso shops just to save a bit of moolah using the free moo juice. Instead of ordering up an iced breve, she'll instead order a shot or two of espresso, a free cup of ice to pour them over, and fill it up to the brim with complimentary half and half at the condiment counter. All in all, she probably saves a little over a buck. Guess this doesn't fly with the baristas in her dream city of Seattle.

Who knew baristas took this so seriously? A post on a blog called Starbucksgossip.com garnered 331 comments on the topic of "ghetto-lattes." And who knew there was so much Starbucks-related gossip? Boy, and I thought I posted a lot of superfluous stuff on my blog...